Relationship Court: Strip Club Advice!

Someone emailed into Relationship Court with a question specifically for Ali, but we’re going to pass this one out to all of our listeners because we know you guys have thoughts on this. What are your thoughts on strip clubs?

Help out Patricia and give us some thoughts on Facebook!

Lamest School District Ever Suspends Half of Graduating Class for Senior Prank

A school district in Texas is laying the hammer down for a harmless school prank. Some students at Comfort High School put plastic forks on the practice football field, while others wrecked havoc by…placing balloons and a deer head inside the school. The school district was not having this and now as these seniors conclude their high school journey, they’re going to be doing it from in-school-suspension.

First of all, this isn’t even a good prank. The kids swung and missed with the idea and the execution. If they were suspended for having bad ideas, we would fully endorse it. But suspending them for planting forks in the ground? Just have them pick it up! What are we doing here?

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Machine Gun Kelly’s Motivational Speech Will Get You Through Today

Whatever you’re going through in life, be assured that Machine Gun Kelly can help you get through it. Just after receiving his Billboard Award for the Best Rock Artist of 2020, the Cleveland-native had this to say.

Use MGK’s words to break out of your box and own the day.

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White Sox Expand Seating Capacity at Guaranteed Rate Field

The best team in baseball is allowing more fans in the stands as of this week. Guaranteed Rate Field will now operate at 60% capacity, allowing just under 25,000 fans to be in the ballpark for South Side greatness. The Sox are home all week, finishing up a series with the St. Louis Cardinals on Thursday before the Orioles come to town for a three-game series.

Social distancing guidelines will still be set in place while for fully vaccinated patrons, masks will be encouraged but not required in outdoor settings.

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Florida School Edited Photos of Women to Make Them Seem “More Appropriate”

We talked a few weeks ago about how there’s a town in Maryland fighting for the right for women to be topless on the beach. In a roundabout way, a school district in Florida is fighting the same fight. 80 seniors at Bartram Trail High School had their photos digitally manipulated to add clothing to areas of the chest that may have been exposed. All of the photos edited were photos of young women and none of them were consulted about this decision prior to the yearbooks being released.

Do schools have the right to edit photos in their yearbook? According to the faculty member who made this decision ,everyone that had their photos edited were in violation of the school dress code. Let us know your thoughts! The conversation lives on Facebook!

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Rats and Mosquitos Are Wreaking Havoc on Chicago

A new study by Orkin revealed that Chicago is the 5th worst city in the US when it comes to mosquitoes. Los Angeles, Fresno, Seattle, and Atlanta are some of the biggest hotspots around the country, but none of those cities are dealing with the rat problem that Chicago is also dealing with. Rats are nipping at your feet while mosquitoes are terrorizing us from above. Navigating Chicago is just one giant minefield.

Do you have a way to combat mosquitoes in your neighborhood? Give us tips on Facebook!

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Bad Neighbors

Karma is a cruel mistress. Even crueler than the lady in the White Honda.

Let us know where you think this is over on our Facebook page!

Man Can’t Stand the Fact That a Hospital Amputated the Wrong Leg

A hospital in Austria is struggling to find answers after making a devastating mistake last week. An 82-year-old man was set to have his left leg removed, but the hospital jotted down the wrong information and out went his right leg instead. The hospital released a statement noting, “A disastrous combination of circumstances led to the patient’s right leg being amputated instead of his left.” They are now providing counseling for the man’s family, who will soon be greeting a leg-less man.

At press time, there is no timetable for how long it could take this injury to “heel”.

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Why You Should Already Be Worrying About “The Next Generation”

Thanks to a social researcher, we now know that the generation after Gen Z will be titled Generation Alpha and will consist of children born from 2010-2024. After watching this video, you’ll see why we’re already concerned.

@overtimeThis is what it’s all about, right? 😭 #fail #funny #kids #shoutoutot♬ original sound – Overtime

This video is shocking on a number of levels, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention the grown, adult couple that casually walked by this child viciously whacking himself in the head. They clearly saw that and did nothing. At least pull at your camera like our brave videographer did.

Anyways, Gen Z’s time on this planet has been filled with emotional trauma. Gen Alpha is going to be full of brain trauma.

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Car Tears Up Jackson Park Golf Course!

Jackson Park went full-Grand Theft Auto over the weekend. A driver went wild and took a turn onto the golf course, dodging pedestrians and tearing up the course along the way. This is a situation that seems like a dream come true for the driver and a nightmare for anyone looking to, you know, golf.

Tell us about your own public meltdown over on Facebook!

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Chicago Sports Team Brought Home a Championship This Weekend!

You’ll forever remember where you were when you found out that the Chicago Steel captured the Clark Cup over the weekend. They knocked off the Fargo Force to win the USHL (minor league hockey) title over the weekend. This marks a two year run of dominance for the Steel, who had a killer 2019 season that was cut short due to COVID-19.

White Sox, we’re looking at you now. Bring home a title for us!

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Queued Up Playlist 05/23/21

Hour 1
Green Day Pollyanna
Saint Motel It’s All Happening
Aurora Runaway
Half Alive What’s Wrong
Arlo Parks Hurt
Joywave Every Window is a Mirror
Area 21 la la la
Kid Brunswick When You Were Young
The Neighbourhood Stargazing
Holly Humberstone The Walls Are Way Too Thin
Ya Tseen Knives
Surf Curse Freaks
Suoco SOS
Baio Dead Hand Control
Alice Merton Vertigo
Peachtree Rascals Change My Mind
Hour 2
Bleachers Stop Making this Hurt
Chvrches He Said She Said
Julian Lamadrid 15 Minutes
Tessa Violet Games
Maggie Lindemann Crash and Burn
Kennyhoopla Hollywood Sucks
The Chemical Brothers The Darkness That You Fear
Cannons Bad Dreams
Briston Maroney Bottle Rocket
Beabadoobee Last Day On Earth
Xiu Xiu A Bottle of Rum
Manchester Orchestra Bedhead
Poorstacy Public Enemy
Modest Mouse We are Between
Vance Joy Missing Piece
Willow Transparent Soul
The Joy Formidable Into the Blue
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5.23.2021 History Of Alternative

Hour 1

  • Foo Fighters – Big Me
  • XTC – Senses Working Overtime
  • Smashing Pumpkins – Cherub Rock
  • Kajagoogoo – Too Shy
  • Modest Mouse – Ocean Breathes Salty
  • No Doubt – Don’t Speak
  • Urge Overkill – Sister Havana
  • Incubus – Wish You Were Here
  • Hole – Doll Parts
  • Talking Heads – And She Was
  • Band Of Horses – No One’s Gonna Love You
  • Green Day – Holiday

Hour 2

  • Morrissey – Suedehead
  • Butthole Surfers – Pepper
  • Pearl Jam – Daughter
  • Bow Wow Wow – I Want Candy
  • Radiohead – Creep
  • Young The Giant – My Body
  • Blondie – One Way Or Another
  • Primus – Jerry Was A Race Car Driver
  • Jimmy Eat World – A Praise Chorus
  • The Cult – She Sells Sanctuary
  • Nirvana – Dumb
  • Elastica – Connection
  • Sublime – Doin’ Time


Hour 3

  • Foo Fighters – Learn to Fly
  • Vampire Weekend – A-Punk
  • Weezer – Island In The Sun
  • The English Beat – Save It For Later
  • The Ramones – Blitzkrieg Bop
  • Belly – Feed The Tree
  • Depeche Mode – Just Can’t Get Enough
  • All Time Low – Dear Maria, Count Me In
  • Beck – The New Pollution
  • The Smithereens – A Girl Like You
  • Alanis Morissette – Ironic
  • Cake – Short Skirt/Long Jacket
  • Temple Of The Dog – Hunger Strike

Hour 4

  • Modest Mouse – Float On
  • Siouxsie And The Banshees – Cities In Dust
  • Local H – Bound For The Floor
  • The Pretenders – Back On The Chain Gang
  • Beastie Boys – Body Movin’
  • Angels And Airwaves – The Adventure
  • The Cure – Love Cats
  • Matthew Sweet – Sick Of Myself
  • The Strokes – Someday
  • Berlin – The Metro
  • Cracker – Low
  • Limp Bizkit – Nookie

TV news reporter finds, saves stolen dog on camera

While reporting on a dog that was stolen out of a car earlier that day — a TV reporter spotted the pooch being walked by the alleged thief, interviewed him, and called 9-1-1 to bring police to the scene.  The crazy story was captured on video, which is below.

Cambridge Police charged the 29 year old show in the video below with larceny as well as breaking & entering a motor vehicle with the intent to commit a felony.  “Titus,” a German Short-Haired Pointer, has been reunited with their owner.

Dave Grohl will host the Tonight Show Monday

Remember when you bought that Peloton and got a 5 day streak during this pandemic and thought to yourself “I am crushing life right now with my productivity. Im the king’qheen of the world!!!”  Just me?  Oh, well anyways, if you thought you were making the most of the pandemic, here comes Dave Grohl to one up you yet again.  He has released a book, done 2 movies, dropped an album, will headline Lollapalooza, been inducted in to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame (again), and now he’s going to host the dang Tonight Show!

In conclusion, set your DVRs and Dave Grohl is better than us all.  And thats OK, he seems cool.

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Butt Implant Sales Have Soared in the Last Year

The pandemic has given people time to reflect and think about how they’d like to change themselves in a post-pandemic world. For some people, they challenged themselves to do an act of kindness a day. For others, they wanted butt implants. According to The American Society of Plastic Surgeons, butt implant sales went up 22% last year, beating out breast and hair implants.

On a related note, if anyone knows a butt surgeon for Brian, Ali, & Justin (mainly for Brian & Justin) please let us know.

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How Did You Torture Your Younger Sibling?

Change is happening all around us, but one thing remains the same: younger siblings are always going to get the worst possible outcome. In this case, it was an unholy posterization that will send shivers down the spine of every basketball fan.

How did you torture your younger sibling? Let us know over on Facebook!

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